What would it take to reinstate...

It just happened again. Another troll took to an internet forum where I'm very active and threw out this ridiculous question: "What would it take to reinstate Donald Trump to the Presidency?"

Well, here's my take: I’d advocate for Mango Mussolini to be reinstated as President once he performs this easy feat, which we all know he’s more than capable of doing, what with him being the most tremendous, strong, America-loving and athletic President we’ve ever been blessed by God to have:

All he’d have to do would be to have MSNBC video tape him putting on his golf cleats and then climbing up the Statue of Liberty to the tippy-top of Lady Liberty’s sacred flame. Then, he’d merely have to douse himself with a fifth of Trump Vodka and light himself on fire with John McCain’s Zippo lighter.

Then he would just have to do a triple back summersault with one and a half twists and land his now very orange-tinged, crispy and generously-sized ass into the harbor without making a single splash!

And from there I would only require the simple act of doody donald pulling his badass self out of New York Harbor by grasping his manly, flaming-red, beautifully-flowing necktie in his tiny, perfectly-caramelized hands and pulling with all his manly-mighty-might!

I know that other previously trump-hating Americans might have higher expectations as far as letting our Lord-and-Master trump come down from his cross to be reinstated to the Presidency but that’s all I’d require.

Yeah, I know… I’d be letting him off too easy. 

Ya got me!

"Bulldog Ben" Basile

© 2023 Ben Lawrence Basile